A Critic's Prayer

Dear God,

I showed up to the concert, but the singer was a fake and the music was obtuse.

I checked out a book, but the author was entitled and the content was boring.

I went out to eat, but the waiter was clueless and the shrimp was overcooked.

I drove to the beach, but parking took forever and the wind was frigid.

I found an apartment, but the neighbors are strange and the heat costs a fortune.

I sat through Chapel, but the message was irrelevant and the drums were too loud.

I called my friend, but the voicemail box was full and phone tag gets old.

I learned to knit, but the yarn is thin and my scarf looks like a potholder.

I walked in the woods, but the path was marked with puddles and my shoes are covered in mud.

I drew a picture, but the watercolors leaked through the page and the shading is off.

I got a job, but the pay is terrible and my boss is a tyrant.

I watched a movie, but it had no plot and the soundtrack was a flop.

I ordered a latte, but the mug was tiny and espresso scorched my tongue.

I prayed to You for abundant life, but You never answer and I am tired of trying.

Amen.